Find me a soulmate or I shall surely perish

Date: Fri, 07 Aug 1998
From: Jeffrey <laevatein_at_aris.jpl.nasa.gov>
Subject: <G>

Rico, my name is Jeffrey, idolgical father of the Temple of
Atonement Theme Camp.  Damn... what a wicked concept... I am
so there; cudo's to you and your on a magnificent concept!

Is there any method of expediting myself into soulmate bliss? 
Lemme run down the recent events in my life in an attempt to
prove that I am incapable of locating the correct person.

In the last two months I've been subjected to the following
by someone whom I had known for 15 years:

contrived 911 call
emergency restraining order
permanant restraining order 
child custody hearing (cited BM participation as bad behavior)
in which custody was granted to me at *her* discretion; I
haven't seen my 7 year old son in two months.

Yes, I have a lawyer. ;-)

In short, the woman whom I put through college, supported and
provided for made me homeless in less than a day and damn am I
ever in need of professional service as I obviously couldn't
locate a true soulmate if she came up and clubbed me like a
baby seal.

I emplore you...

I beg you...

Find me a soulmate or I shall surely perish. ;-)

ciao,

J'